Downtown Abbey in Limerick

How sharp are the barbs of Lady Violet--
Yet often make the whole fam'ly smile a bit,
With her ignorance abounding
When old times are a-floundering:
The weekend's still giving her fits.

Thank Heavens Lady Isobel's provincial,
Or Downton Abbey'd never been an hospital--
But only for the officers,
Yet she still has on offer
Her grace to some girls prostitutional.

Lady Edith so longs to be loved.
For years, Mary's beaux she's begrudged.
Her amour will not fester,
But a wife like Rochester's
Prohibits her fitting like a glove.

Lady Violet is shocked that they're leaving
Propriety on the floors just like heathens
With cheese and some fruit
When dinner goes kaput.
Cora's mum saves the day with cold chicken.

Mr. Bates has a past with a clank
But guards villains no matter how rank--
'Cept for devils in the jail
Who'd stow 'im beyond the pale
And from Anna whose love is quite frank.

Might Carson his feelings allay--
The butler ask Mrs. Hughes to display
A wedding wish for him
Or take it on the chin
And survey the 'remains of the day'?

We fear Cousin Rose will be erring
Due to Mummy's alerts in forbearing.
Mum Susan's sour face
Expects her disgrace,
But with Matthew, she's just a rosie herring.

It is hinted that tragedy does loom.
Gaelis' hunting does threaten with doom.
Might Anna and Mr. Bates
On their picnic by the lake
Be took as stags as a rifle goes boom?

Lord Grantham ranks un-utilitarian
On matters of Downton agrarian,
But it all becomes clear
As Lord Matt grants an heir,
But dear Crawley slips into thin air again.

Lord Fellowes breaks the hearts of the ladies
Who swoon at the dynasty's tragedies.
His resolution sends them staggering
As if Shakespeare's been daggering--
As Matt and Mary make a wrap of their duties.

Downton's future's in the arms of a babe.
With male issue, Lady Mary has saved
Father's years from living anxious
If with Matthew's sense of business,
The lad can bring it back from the grave.

(Many thanks to creator Sir Julian Fellowes and PBS)